The Ego Tango
How to get what you want, more often, with less hassle
The Ego Tango
The Ego Tango

 How to get more of what you want, more often, with less hassle

Do you have colleagues, family members or neighbors that just ‘drive you crazy’ sometimes?

Do you occasionally find yourself feeling disrespected or annoyed by others?

If this is true for you, read on.

In this book The Ego Tango, communication coach and trainer, Amy Carroll, shows you what you may be unknowingly doing that could be sabotaging your business and personal relationships. And better yet, what you can do differently to get more desirable outcomes. More specifically, to get more of what you want, more often, with less hassle!

This book is both a collection of highly entertaining stories and a portable coach. Not only will you personally identify with each story (or know someone in your life who does), you will discover the 7 Partner Mindset Techniques, together with a series of coaching questions to successfully achieve more desirable outcomes in all of your relationships.

In addition, you will discover the user-friendly Predator, Prey or Partner™ communication model while reading examples of Predator mishaps, Prey misfortunes and Partner-in-Action stories, and discover how you can shift from Predator or Prey into Partner!

Amy Carroll, Carroll Communication Coaching

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What People Are Saying...

George Kohlrieser Ph.D
Professor of Leadership and Organizational Behavior, IMD
Author of
Hostage at the Table

Amy Carroll’s engaging and very readable book approaches the topic of communication by taking a closer look at a number of her own life stories and experiences. Her very energetic style, drawn from her background in improvisational theatre, highlights how we are constantly tested by situations that can easily escalate into conflict. Amy Carroll highlights the skills and attitudes required to positively confront conflict and to effectively use these situations as opportunities to strengthen and reinforce interpersonal relationships.

Ellen Snortland
Altadena, CA
Writer, author, activist

Amy’s book helped us recently during a family crisis. There is a Buddhist saying: ‘When the student is ready, the teacher appears’. The timing on reading Undoing the Ego Tango was like that. The Predator/ Prey distinction prepared me for an emergency and made a difference for all of us.

I’m grateful to Amy Carroll for her wisdom.

Sarah Santacroce

Here is the scenario: person A, let’s call her Sarah, is unhappy with her web hosting service. After multiple attempts of getting help with the slow server, and unsatisfying e-mail exchanges she decides to cancel the service. Since she has paid for two years in advance, she kindly asks them if they could reimburse her. They tell her no. And that’s where she makes her big mistake: she writes back that she finds this very disappointing and unprofessional. Oh my, those web guys don’t like that. They reply with a nasty e-mail and you guessed it, tell her that there's nothing wrong with their server and it’s all her fault because she doesn’t know how to “debug”.

How did Sarah feel that morning ? Not very good. Aggressive, disappointed, taken for an idiot. Did this ever happen to you ? How would you have reacted ?If only Sarah had read Amy Carroll’s book Undoing the Ego Tango - before hitting the send button ! In her book, Amy will tell you many similar scenarios that happened to her, and how she turned them around and made them into a positive experience. She has a very engaging and energetic style and you will just want to keep reading. To make it even more beneficial for you, she throws in some self-reflecting questions after each chapter, making it almost into one of her private coaching sessions. The “Ego Tango” will help you take a deep breath, analyze the situation, decide if your ego is willing to take the blow, and then present your opponent with a solution that has a positive outcome for both parties. It is applicable for personal or professional relationships.

The book is a good read and I highly recommend it.

Adrijana Strnad
Coach, Trainer, Facilitator

The book is amazing. I love the simplicity and how it moves people to action.

Dr. Bobbi French
Psychiatrist and author of Finding Me in France

I've just finished my first read through of Undoing the Ego Tango and I'm very impressed. I really like the respect and empathy focus as well as the undoing of assumptions and the emphasis on awareness.

Really good stuff that is presented in such an informative and accessible way. I imagine that these simple yet vital strategies change not only how people behave at work but also how they behave in every relationship in their lives. Brava girl!!

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The Moment of Truth Worksheet Downloads

Assignment 1 Assignment 2 Assignment 4
Assignment 5 Assignment 6 Assignment 7 Assignment 8
Assignment 9 Assignment 10 Assignment 11

Did you get it right?


Towards the end of The Ego Tango, is the story, ‘Stopped by a Cop’.

In this story are examples of several concepts and Partner mindset techniques which I apply, getting an unexpected outcome.

Click the here and read the solution!


Amy Carroll
Carroll Communication Coaching

Rue de l'Union 20
1800 Vevey

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The Ego Tango